My Nonprofit Reviews

On December 13 2018 I took 60 400mg Seroquel pills with a 1/5 of bourbon and once everything took hold, I walked into into a lake at a secluded location I had selected. That was my last was the last thing I remembered before my experience. What happened to my body after that I only know from second hand conversations. Here is a brief synapses of what happened to my body. Unbeknownst to me, there were some homeless people camping up the road from the spot I had chosen to commit suicide. They said they found it odd that someone was were i was so late at night and had walked down to the lake to investigate. When they arrived to where my vehicle was parked they noticed my headlights shining onto the water and seen my body floating face down in the water. They called 911. It took the ambulance roughly fifteen minutes to arrive while the people who pulled me out of the water did CPR. I had was not breathing and had no pulse when the medics arrived. I was revived sometime during the thirty minute trip to the hospital where I woke up three days later in the ICU.
Here is what I remember after walking in the water. I remember walking into the water and thinking how cold the water was. Then my mind went blank. The next thing I remember is my mind coming alive in this pure panic mode but not being able to move and then suffocating. I remember trying to grab my throat and inhale but I was completely paralyzed. I don't remember where I was at this point. Like I couldn't hear anything going on and I didn't feel cold. All I knew was panic, no air, not breathing, trying to thrash around not moving panic. Then this vibration started. It started like a buzz then grew into this vibration that seemed to be coming from me and around me at the same time. That seemed to go on for several minutes along with the panic and the struggle to try and breathe. Then in an instant I felt this I felt this warm sensation all over and this like relaxing or letting go sensation just felt like it was all over. .at this point everything is still black like I've got my eyes closed in a dark room. There is a faint buzzing sound like it's leftover from the vibration. Then the darkness starts to get lighter and lighter. And the lighter it gets, colors start to come into focus. It keeps getting lighter and more colors appear until , the best I can describe it is it's like being in a bubble the size of a football stadium and the bubble is made of a kaleidoscope that is pointed at a bright light source. It was very peaceful beautiful. I have no concept of time at this point so I can't tell you how long it lasted. Then everything just started to fade. No panic or anything really. I remember thinking to my self how beautiful it was. And that was it. The next thing I know and as best I can describe it is the sensation of having your skin ripped off but without the pain and this deafening loud ripping sound and feeling like my whole body is being pulled out of something. Then for just a brief moment I was aware of my surroundings. What I seen and felt is hard to put into words. I have to say it like this, the universe is a container for everything that is, was, or will ever be and everything in that container is information. I was were that information was stored. When I was pulled out I was being pulled backwards what seemed incredibly fast. I looked down and it was like and endless flat ocean of black that stretch stretched into infinity. The only reason I could have any orientation to any kind of horizon was for these massive tornado like columns of light that was coming from above me and touching the flat black ocean in sporadic points into infinity. I'll never forget the feeling I had for the rest of my life. It was the feeling of nowhere. I can only describe it as being across an entire universe away from anyone. Then it was all gone and it was like waking up from a dreamless sleep. I remember cracking open one eye and seeing hospital equipment the feeling tubes down my throat. It was like that for a few days. Just waking up here and there and feeling the tubes down my throat and being strapped down to the hospital bed so I didn't pull them out. I fully came to a few days after and made my way to recovery. Good did come from all that mess though. I quit drinking right then and there cold turkey and got psychological help and am healthy and happy now.