My Nonprofit Reviews

Hi. Please donate to KARA. Please donate to KARA, NOW.

I want to share a life changing event with you.

January 9th, 2006, my 19 year old daughter. Stevie, took her own life. She changed the lives of many with her beautiful self and her existence. She changed the lives of many with her final act of suicide. Stevie changed my life with both.

As a result of Stevie’s death, I have a profound urge to help others suffering from the loss of a loved one who has died by suicide. I desperately want to be there for them. That is the only way for me to go on. This is the only way to make a negative experience have positive meaning. This is the only way for me to continue, to give, and to grow. And what else is there?
We all know life is about creating love and meaning for our loved ones and ourselves. I hope you, who are reading or seeing this, can create meaning for yourself and for your loved ones in this life.

KARA is an organization dedicated to helping others get through, survive and come out on the other side of grief. Kara exists in Palo Alto, California. I am a volunteer at Kara. I am a peer counselor. I also facilitate groups for survivors of suicide loss.

I want to share a short story of suicide loss and a bit of healing along the way that I was lucky enough to be a part of, because of KARA.

A beautiful vital young woman came to me recently. She lost a brother to suicide almost 25 years ago and was coming up upon the 25th anniversary of his death. As often happens with clients of mine, there was a similarity in our losses. My client lost her brother when she was 22 years of age, her brother was 19, blame of loss resided partly with the parents. I lost my 19 year old, my surviving daughter was 22 at the time, I was to blame.

The 25 year anniversary was a milestone for my client, and brought up feelings of depression, sadness and guilt. At our first meeting, we spoke of her loss, feelings of love, happiness, guilt, and sadness. My client’s feelings were further complicated by the fact that the anniversary date of her brother’s death was the same date as her husband’s birthday, a happy date that needed to be celebrated by all, including my client. At the end of our 1st meeting, I recall my client commenting on my openness regarding my loss.

At our 2nd meeting, my client was in a positive frame of mind. She had gone through the 25th anniversary of her brother’s passing and she had shared her loss of him on Facebook. As a result of this, she had received many supportive and loving responses from friends of hers and her brother via Facebook. She seemed really happy to me. I was surprised that she was so happy. We talked about the change in her demeanor and feelings. She said she had never openly shared her loss before – her feelings of loss were wrapped in shame and secreted away. She also deferred her sad feelings to the happiness of her husband's birthday.

With the open sharing of her grief, she was coming out and owning her feelings. She acknowledged her dear brother, his love and his positive life.

That was big!! I don’t know if I will see this wonderful woman again, but she has changed my life, and KARA has changed hers. Most Kara clients and Kara relationships are not that short, but all are meaningful and healing.

I am grateful to be part of the Kara organization. I hope you call for help if you would like any kind of grief support.

AND PLEASE DONATE TO KARA. KARA IS A LOVING, GIVING, MEANINGFUL ORGANIZATION.