Victims Resource Center Inc

In 2003 I had been attacked by my boyfriend this was not my first attack or even first abusive boyfriend. For several weeks I knew I had to leave him so I started making little piles of things I would need to leave and hid them. He ended finding some of my stash and this enraged him. He beat me up and raped me. He hit me so hard that he sprained his wrist. When he was done with me he decided to go hunting behind his house. He made me help him get dressed in his camo outfit because he was in too much pain. He left to go hunting and I watched him leave for the woods. I grabbed my keys and left. I was about an hour from my home town. I drove there because I knew where the domestic violence shelter was. I went to the shelter and they convinced me to get a PFA and press charges on him. I had to go through a series of pictures by the doctors and they took a rape kit. I had to wait there at the hospital with an advocate until some officers from the county I was attacked came up to take down a report. It was very odd though them giving me a male advocate. But we did bond and he was a victim himself. The police showed up took down my report and tool picture. A few days later I attended a PFA hearing and was awarded the order. He was not supposed to contact me but he contacted my friend several times just to say I left different things at his house. I knew he just wanted to get under my skin. One night I got drunk and called him because I was lonely and feeling guilty. He ended up showing up at my apartment in the projects. Then he convinced me to ride down to his hearing with him because I wrecked my car several days before the hearing. I did go with him and drop the charges. I was so ashamed of myself but I did it anyways. One the way back to my apartment he started saying really derogatory things to me. He wanted to have sex with me and I let him. I felt sick. I could not even look at myself in the mirror. He called the next day I did not respond. I answered one night right before I was going out. He wanted to see me but I refused and told him I was going to a local bar with some friends. I was going alone just to be away from the situation. I left the bar and got into my truck on and was pulled over by the police. I was arrested for DUI. The next day he called me and said he would get me out of trouble because he has a great lawyer and knows the judge personally. I said No. He harassed me for the next two weeks and I would not go back. I did not have a car so I had to walk to work which was about 3 miles from my house. I had to walk through my old neighborhood which was embarrassing. On top of all that the place I was working did not have their septic set up and had no running water so I had to bring my own jugs of water with me when I walked to work. He had tried to stalk me a couple times and tried to get a hold of me. I never fell back into that trap. The funny thing about my story is that he slit my wrist one nigh, pushed me threw a plate glass window, raped me, degraded me in public and I stayed with him it was not until I took a good look at me that I found the strength to leave him for good. I had to want me back and I did. I have been away from him and violence for 13 years now. He told me once I would be nothing without him that I was a nobody. Since then I received a bachelors, a masters, and am currently working on my second one. I do not have my dream job yet but I know I will. I have been in a loving relationship for 9 years now only after a long period of finding myself. I love my life. I am not rich like I was before but I am stable. I do not have fancy things like in the past but I chose what I wear. I don't have him anymore to get all those things but I do have me and no amount of money or status will ever take that away again. Jodie 13 years safe.