Community Hospice Of Northeast Florida Inc

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Nonprofit Overview

Causes: Hospices, Human Services

Mission: To improve the quality of life for patients and families and be the compassionate guide for end-of-life care in our community.

Community Stories

1 Story from Volunteers, Donors & Supporters

Amy_L General Member of the Public

Rating: 5

04/22/2016

Thanking Bridget:
Community Hospice of Northeast Florida
http://communityhospice.com/

It's been almost 18 years since my mother passed away after a 6 month, brutally hard battle with colon cancer. Because she was only in her 40s, she felt the pressure to fight as hard as she could to be a survivor even though her diagnosis came way too late.

She went through surgeries, chemotherapy, hair loss, and all of the other ghastly side effects of cancer treatment. The never ending trips to the hospital for lab work, CT scans, etc. were a fulltime job for us.

After about 3 months, she decided she'd had enough of chemotherapy so she opted for the alternative medicine route which included more tortuous treatments and a lot of false hope but she was determined to not to give up. The word 'survivor' has become inextricably linked to cancer so she had somehow absorbed the message that not surviving was a personal failure - her fault for not 'fighting' hard enough.

The result was that toward the end, she was sleepless, incoherent with pain, and prone to rage. She was adamant that I not call hospice because that meant she had given up and failed. In desperation, I called her oncologist who told me to call them anyway and tell them the situation.

I can never repay that hospice team for what they did for her, and for me, in those final 2 weeks before she died. They took off their hospice badges when they went in her room and identified themselves as a home health agency. I'm sure she knew who they were but they allowed her to have the space she needed to feel like she was continuing to fight.

Every member of the team made our lives better in some way at the end. The nurse got my mom's pain under control. The counselor reassured me that it was okay that she was mad - of course she was mad to be dying in her 40s. It didn't mean she was having a 'bad' death because she didn't cycle through arbitrary stages. Even the minister was a comfort and we weren't religious people.

But the person who had the most impact was the volunteer. She was a red-haired lady who had lost her son to cancer and she had this magical softness and empathy that allowed her to break through my mom's rage and denial. I overheard them talking and for the first time, I heard her cry and talk about not getting to meet her grandchildren someday.

Because of Bridget, I think I realized that her fight wasn't just about surviving because she was too young to die. She wanted to survive for me too. And she wanted to survive so she could meet my children.

My mom was a lot calmer after Bridget's visits and because her pain was under control. So, after five and a half months of a terrible nightmare, we had some lovely, peaceful days at the end because of Bridget and the whole hospice team.

Because of what they did for us, I volunteer a bit of time (and money whenever I'm able) when my kids are in school to sit with terminal patients who are with Community Hospice. I know I can never live up to how magical Bridget was but I hope that I can repay her a little bit by trying to be someone else's Bridget and maybe bring comfort to another family.
#mygivingstory

Review from #MyGivingStory

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