Empowerhouse

December 21, 2023

I had the misfortune of staying in this shelter for a week during the summer of 2023. The abusive tone of this shelter was influenced by the daily manager, Rose, an unfulfilled lesbian who apparently is using her position to target female domestic violence victims who are mostly heterosexual. I was thrown out after a week even though I had no conflict with any of the residents – Rose put in writing that I was supposedly “unfit for shelter life”, meaning that I was unfit for her sexual advances.

Other female staff ranged from excellent, caring individuals to lackeys who enforce Rose’s will. The shelter itself has nice shared rooms for single residents inside self-contained suites, and larger rooms for residents with children. It has a beautiful kitchen, as well as a tremendous quantity and variety of donated goods, including frozen meat. Residents who can cook will eat well here.

Many of the plaques on the doors of individual suites credit the names of generous Jewish people who made significant donations to this shelter. I myself have visible Jewish heritage and was heartbroken to be thrown out of a shelter designed to help women like me by an unprofessional predator like Rose. I would implore Jewish donors to stop making donations to Empower House until Rose, the daily manager, and her immediate assistant, Olivia, are removed from their jobs. LET THIS REVIEW SERVE AS A CLEAR MESSAGE NOT TO ACCEPT MONEY FROM THE JEWISH COMMUNITY WHILE YOU TURN AROUND AND ABUSE JEWISH RESIDENTS.

A number of residents have managed to negotiate this shelter successfully, and have used the time spent here to obtain court orders on behalf of their children, child support payments from abusive partners, etc. I do not want to give the impression that this is not possible for women who manage to sidestep or negotiate the toxic dynamics of this place.

My advice would be to watch how one is treated during one’s very first days here. I was told that I could be moved from my room at any time for any reason, and I was indeed pulled out of my room at 10:00 pm and reassigned on my second night there, even though I was exhausted and had to go to work the next day and had no energy to take all my belongings with me, and to make up a new bed. There was no reason given, and in fact they did not need the bedroom for a newly arrived resident. The shelter was only half full during my time of stay. In retrospect, I should have realized that this was a clear signal that I would be singled out for further abuse, which was exactly what happened.

If one has geographic flexibility, and not everyone does, there are much better domestic violence shelters in Virginia. A friend was able to get into Bethany House in McLean, VA (there is a wait for this shelter, which is apparently always full). Safe Harbor in Richmond, VA has also improved significantly, and is now a less abusive alternative to Empower House – I was treated with dignity and respect at Safe Harbor.

Empowerhouse has an established record of supporting those who are battling or seeking help for domestic violence issues.
When my son and I needed assistance to escape my ex-husband’s abuse, Empowerhouse was there for us every step of the way. They help me obtain a protective order, helped me file papers in court for custody of my son, and provided an excellent staff and volunteers that were compassionate and very helpful. I did not even know that Empowerhouse had court, advocates. These volunteers that attend court with those going through domestic violence for support advocacy, and an ear to listen as well as a shoulder to cry on. Empowerhouse helps survivors find housing, medical care, support groups and much more.

My life was significantly impacted by Empowerhouse. I would not be where I am today without their dedication and passion to help those who are in a domestic violence situation.

Regards,

~ Holley Jacobs