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138 Reviews
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October 31, 2014

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October 31, 2014

I thought I was alone but sadly realized i had a many others who were silently suffering from the shame and humiliation of a relationship that fell apart because my spouse lied to me about his orientation. The pain and embarrassment that I felt was debilitating. I was depressed and suicidal.
Living in a small, religious rural town where homosexuality is frowned upon, it was impossible to discuss my feelings with anyone. I found the Straight Spouse Network and immediately connected with others who shared a simliar story. I no longer felt alone. I developed friends and coping skills that allowed me to wake up each day and face my changing life.
I am four years post discover and am now at a point where I no longer feel anger or shame. But the effects of the lies and the emotional impact still shape how I relate to people. The SSN gave me perspective and the other survivors encouraged me to see that it would get better. They were right. It got better, it hurts less and now I can participate and give encouragement to those who are in a similar situation.


October 30, 2014

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October 30, 2014

The straight spouse network has been invaluable to me since I had to initiate divorce from my husband. The facilitators are responsive and knowledgable. The groups are great.
October 30, 2014

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1 previous review
July 6, 2009

The help and friendships that the Straight Spouse Network gave me the most wonderful success to a new life after my husband came out of the closest. more

October 30, 2014

They kept me going with internet communication and f2f meeting and individuals for the longest time. I keep a list open trying to be there for the newcomer. Thank you!
July 6, 2009

The help and friendships that the Straight Spouse Network gave me the most wonderful success to a new life after my husband came out of the closest.

The Great!

I've personally experienced the results of this organization in...

many people as they are healed.

Ways to make it better...

If I had to make changes to this organization, I would...

More feedback...

What I've enjoyed the most about my experience with this nonprofit is...

The friendships

The kinds of staff and volunteers that I met were...

Every kind imaginable

Ways to make it better...

if they had more exposure as there must be so many people that need the services

In my opinion, the biggest challenges facing this organization are...

Money

When was your last experience with this nonprofit?

2009

October 30, 2014
1 person found this review helpful

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3 previous reviews - show all
June 28, 2012

The Straight Spouse Network helped me so much 12 years ago when I found out my husband was gay. I had immediate help! Someone contacted me immediately once I found this organization. The lifeline of t... more

October 30, 2014
1 person found this review helpful

I found this organization back in 2000 a few months after my then husband came out of the closet, announcing to me after almost 20 years of marriage, that he was gay. The group of people here reached out to me and listened and let me know I was not alone and with the help of Amity Pierce Buxton's book, the Other Side of the Closet, I was able to move forward with my kids, in a healthy manner. I discovered there were/are Face to Face Groups that get together at various locations throughout the country. This has been a God-send. I am post-disclosure 14 years and at this juncture my now new Hubby and I are at the Volunteer point where we give back our time and we organize an annual weekend Str8 event that takes place in October.

More feedback...

How would you describe the help you got from this organization?

Life-changing

How likely are you to recommend this organization to a friend?

Definitely

How do you feel you were treated by this organization?

Very Well

When was your last experience with this nonprofit?

2014

June 28, 2012

The Straight Spouse Network helped me so much 12 years ago when I found out my husband was gay. I had immediate help! Someone contacted me immediately once I found this organization. The lifeline of the Straight Spouse Network helped me feel not so alone, It helped me feel sane and helped me get through this crazy mess of being married to a gay spouse. I am indebted to them which is why I am now in the give back mode and now help others in this unique situation.

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Would you volunteer for this group again?

Definitely

For the time you spent, how much of an impact did you feel your work or activity had?

Life-changing

Did the organization use your time wisely?

Very Well

Would you recommend this group to a friend?

Definitely

When was your last experience with this nonprofit?

2012

September 7, 2010
1 person found this review helpful

My husband at the time, after 20 years of marriage, came out of the closet. If I hadn't found the Straight Spouse Network I think I would have fallen into a deeper depression. The people involved who helped me, "get it" meaning they understood what was transpiring in my life and gave me tools to help me cope through this difficult situation. Help not just for me but also for my kids and gave me a much better understanding of what my husband was going through at the time. This organization is a lifeline to sanity. And not only that, it educates the masses as we strive to build bridges with the LGBT communities.

The Great!

I've personally experienced the results of this organization in...

My husband at the time, after 20 years of marriage, came out of the closet. If I hadn't found the Straight Spouse Network I think I would have fallen into a deeper depression. The people involved who helped me, "get it" meaning they understood what was transpiring in my life and gave me tools to help me cope through this difficult situation. Help not just for me but also for my kids and gave me a much better understanding of what my husband was going through at the time. This organization is a lifeline to sanity. And not only that, it educates the masses as we strive to build bridges with the LGBT communities.

More feedback...

What I've enjoyed the most about my experience with this nonprofit is...

is that the people I have met are now some of my lifelong friends. My new extended family.

The kinds of staff and volunteers that I met were...

patient, there at all times for me, compassionate to my situation.

If this organization had 10 million bucks, it could...

spread the word on our mission to build bridges wit the LGBT community and to let others know world wide that there is hope nad life after your spouse/partner come out.

How frequently have you been involved with the organization?

About every week

When was your last experience with this nonprofit?

2010

June 30, 2009

The Straight Spose network was a godsend when my husband came out of th closet back in 1999. He first told me he was bisexual..and I looked online for any type of help to explain this situation. We had been married almost 20 years with 2 kids, in West Michigan, where anything gay is most surely closeted. As I surfed the net I came across the Straight Spouse Network. This support group literally saved my life. It is a very safe haven for the str8 spouse...I was able to vent and cry to a wonderful group of people that new exactly what I was feeling and going through. And the help was extended to my children too. The online support is invaluable. The face to face meetings are necessary............and agian, a safe haven to cry and listen and vent.

The Great!

I've personally experienced the results of this organization in...

all the faces and hearts of the people who came to this community looking for answers and understanding. The compassion, knowledge, and time involved with everyone is just out of this world.

More feedback...

What I've enjoyed the most about my experience with this nonprofit is...

all the wonderful people I have met who will be part of my extended family for life. We have a great understanding of each other. We " get it". And we are more than happy to help newbies in this situation with open hearts and arms.

The kinds of staff and volunteers that I met were...

generous with their time, patient, compassionate and loving. And always available! This was/is amazing.

If this organization had 10 million bucks, it could...

speak loudly about the str8 spouse, through larger venues for fundraising, maybe bringing in bigger named speakers........allowing board members/( the ones who speak well to the public) to travel to various events to spread the word.

When was your last experience with this nonprofit?

2009

October 30, 2014

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October 30, 2014

I found and opened the link to Straight Spouse Network in the summer of 2012...after having been married to a closeted gay man for 20 years. I was just browsing for articles and support having to do with how other people survived and made it work in their own Mixed Orientation Marriages. A few months later, I discovered my marriage was full of infidelities I had no knowledge of (we had promised monogamy in year 10 of our marriage) and had been over for more than three years, only I hadn't known it. The support I got through Straight Spouse Network, including email and recommended reading, really helped guide me in the chaos of starting over as a single woman, a formerly Straight Spouse.

More feedback...

How would you describe the help you got from this organization?

Life-changing

How likely are you to recommend this organization to a friend?

Definitely

How do you feel you were treated by this organization?

Very Well

When was your last experience with this nonprofit?

2014

October 30, 2014

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October 30, 2014

This organization helped me at one of the darkest times of my life. They literally saved my life, scraping up from the floor when I felt I could no longer go on. I have been a part of this organization since April 2008, and I am grateful every day for the volunteers who reach out for shell-shocked straight spouses and bring them into the fold. My only wish is that the organization did not have to exist, but I am on-so blessed that they do.

More feedback...

When was your last experience with this nonprofit?

2014

October 30, 2014

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October 30, 2014

I found Straight Spouse Network after discovering that my husband of 14 years was gay. This group is amazing for the support they provide. Time after time they have shown me that I am not alone and that others understand.
October 30, 2014

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October 30, 2014

This is a Life Changing group even though I was already 2 years post divorce from a "Still in Denial Gay" ex husband after 22 years of marriage. The comfort and camaraderie I found in this group gave me the confidence and strength to face my " Still in closet" ex spouse on a daily basis while we co-parenting two teen-agers. I wish we have more publicity.

More feedback...

How would you describe the help you got from this organization?

Life-changing

How likely are you to recommend this organization to a friend?

Definitely

How do you feel you were treated by this organization?

Very Well

When was your last experience with this nonprofit?

2014

October 30, 2014

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October 30, 2014

This group is very important and serves a particular need that is not served in any other capacity. This is a bonding, caring group of people that support each other in ways that help heal. I needed this group after I found out my husband of many years was hiding a secret and is gay. We had to divorce and this group was there for me. I don't know how else I would have made it through the situation. There's no book, therapist, friend or family member that can help in the same ways a network of people who have been through the same thing can.
October 30, 2014
1 person found this review helpful

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October 30, 2014
1 person found this review helpful

In February of 2010 my world was shattered when I discovered my husband of over 30 years had been living a double life. He originally claimed it to be a sex addiction. I could barely breathe, much less function. I demanded he contact the EAP group through work who referred us to a therapist. That therapist referred us to a wonderful group of counselors who handled sex addiction, but the truth of the matter was that although he was addicted to sex, it was with men and he was gay. It wasn't until my therapist referred me to the Straight Spouse Network (SSN) that I knew my prayers had been answered. I contacted them, explained my situation and received immediate support. This group literally saved my life. For the first time since that horrifying February day I knew I was no longer alone in my experience. There were actually others who understood my situation because they had also had their worlds torn apart after discovering their spouses were gay.

What most people don't understand is that this is not the same as finding out your husband has been cheating with another woman, or that your wife has been cheating with another man. Many of us had spouses that blamed the demise of the marriage on us all the while knowing that no matter what we did to fix things it would never work because we were the wrong sex. They essentially stole years of our lives from us taking away our ability to make decisions based on truth. We, being givers and fixers turned ourselves inside out trying to fix the unfixable. We are told to "Get Over It," usually shortly after finding out the truth, while many of our spouses have had years or even decades to manipulate us, convince us we are flawed, strip away our self-esteem, and sometimes even financially ruin us in pursuit of their gay lifestyles. While my gay spouse was congratulated for coming out of the closet and beginning to live his authentic gay life style I was pretty much shoved aside with little to no support until I found SSN. My immediate family was as supportive as they could be, but unless you have lived through it you can't even begin to fathom the destruction this type of situation causes.

It was such a blessing to know that I was not alone. That I wasn't broken. That I did everything I could to save my marriage, and that I wasn't a failure. It all boiled down to the fact that I just wasn't a man. The knowledge that others had been through similar experiences and lived through it to come out a stronger person is what helped me begin the road to recovery. The support I received from this support group had been a true Godsend and the reason I am the strong, independent person I am today. I thank God every day for the Straight Spouse Network and these wonderful people that have become my Familee.

More feedback...

How would you describe the help you got from this organization?

Life-changing

How likely are you to recommend this organization to a friend?

Definitely

How do you feel you were treated by this organization?

Very Well

When was your last experience with this nonprofit?

2014

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