STRAIGHT SPOUSE NETWORK INC

Rating: 4.91 stars   137 reviews

Issues: Mental Health, Human Services

Location: PO Box 507 Mahwah NJ 07430 USA

Mission: Who we are: Current and former Straight Spouses/Partners of Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender people, Mixed Orientation Couples and our Families and Friends. What we do Serve straight spouses, mixed orientation couples, families and community by: * Reaching Out to increase visibility of straight spouses and accessibility to support * Healing and empowering straight spouses to cope constructively * Building Bridges between spouses, within families and with the larger community through support, education and advocacy The Straight Spouse Network (SSN) is an international organization that provides personal, confidential support and information to heterosexual spouses/partners, current or former, of gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender mates and mixed-orientation couples for constructively resolving coming-out problems. SSN also offers research-based information about spouse, couple, and family issues and resources to other family members, professionals, community organizations, and the public. SSN is the only support network of its kind in the world. As outreach, the network offers information about spouse and family issues, mixed orientation marriages and spouse resources to professionals, community organizations and the media.
Results: * 53 support groups in the US and other countries * Spouse contacts for individual sharing in most US states and several foreign countries * Eight online support groups, most with chats and webs attached * Best of Northeast in the 2009 Pride Choice Awards, sponsored by GreatNonprofits
Geographic areas served: Worldwide
2014 Top-Rated Nonprofit
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EIN 52-2300902
(201) 825-7763
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Community Reviews

Rating: 5 stars  

5 people found this review helpful

I volunteer as a support person in my local area. So many lives connected to our situation and very few resources that understand this side of the closet. While many of us support lgbt equality, the closeted community turns a blind eye toward us, as does the lgbt community at large who touts such a difficult path to their sexual freedom and give little if any to the lives and families that are imploded as a result of the "coming out" or "down low" situations we've collectively found ourselves in. SSN and those of us who encompass a wide variety of situations bound by one thread....loving or marrying a closeted lgbt person. It is in our commonality that we find support, resources and a shoulder to cry on or those who understand enough to laugh with us at the absurdity we've endured. The Straight Spouse Network embraces us, when those around us see us as broken people who just need to "get over it".

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Rating: 5 stars  

This is a Life Changing group even though I was already 2 years post divorce from a "Still in Denial Gay" ex husband after 22 years of marriage. The comfort and camaraderie I found in this group gave me the confidence and strength to face my " Still in closet" ex spouse on a daily basis while we co-parenting two teen-agers. I wish we have more publicity.

How would you describe the help you got from this organization?

Life-changing

How likely are you to recommend this organization to a friend?

Definitely

How do you feel you were treated by this organization?

Very Well

When was your last experience with this nonprofit?

2014

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Rating: 5 stars  

This group is very important and serves a particular need that is not served in any other capacity. This is a bonding, caring group of people that support each other in ways that help heal. I needed this group after I found out my husband of many years was hiding a secret and is gay. We had to divorce and this group was there for me. I don't know how else I would have made it through the situation. There's no book, therapist, friend or family member that can help in the same ways a network of people who have been through the same thing can.

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Rating: 5 stars  

Joined SSN when my life fell apart and to this day still rely on it everyday!
Wonderful support group and resources!

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Rating: 5 stars  

1 person found this review helpful

In February of 2010 my world was shattered when I discovered my husband of over 30 years had been living a double life. He originally claimed it to be a sex addiction. I could barely breathe, much less function. I demanded he contact the EAP group through work who referred us to a therapist. That therapist referred us to a wonderful group of counselors who handled sex addiction, but the truth of the matter was that although he was addicted to sex, it was with men and he was gay. It wasn't until my therapist referred me to the Straight Spouse Network (SSN) that I knew my prayers had been answered. I contacted them, explained my situation and received immediate support. This group literally saved my life. For the first time since that horrifying February day I knew I was no longer alone in my experience. There were actually others who understood my situation because they had also had their worlds torn apart after discovering their spouses were gay.

What most people don't understand is that this is not the same as finding out your husband has been cheating with another woman, or that your wife has been cheating with another man. Many of us had spouses that blamed the demise of the marriage on us all the while knowing that no matter what we did to fix things it would never work because we were the wrong sex. They essentially stole years of our lives from us taking away our ability to make decisions based on truth. We, being givers and fixers turned ourselves inside out trying to fix the unfixable. We are told to "Get Over It," usually shortly after finding out the truth, while many of our spouses have had years or even decades to manipulate us, convince us we are flawed, strip away our self-esteem, and sometimes even financially ruin us in pursuit of their gay lifestyles. While my gay spouse was congratulated for coming out of the closet and beginning to live his authentic gay life style I was pretty much shoved aside with little to no support until I found SSN. My immediate family was as supportive as they could be, but unless you have lived through it you can't even begin to fathom the destruction this type of situation causes.

It was such a blessing to know that I was not alone. That I wasn't broken. That I did everything I could to save my marriage, and that I wasn't a failure. It all boiled down to the fact that I just wasn't a man. The knowledge that others had been through similar experiences and lived through it to come out a stronger person is what helped me begin the road to recovery. The support I received from this support group had been a true Godsend and the reason I am the strong, independent person I am today. I thank God every day for the Straight Spouse Network and these wonderful people that have become my Familee.

How would you describe the help you got from this organization?

Life-changing

How likely are you to recommend this organization to a friend?

Definitely

How do you feel you were treated by this organization?

Very Well

When was your last experience with this nonprofit?

2014

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Rating: 5 stars  

Lots of great support provided thru small meetings w others going thru a similar experience. It's amazing to hear the variety of stories all of which have a common theme of a swerving of a marriage when one of the spouses awakens to being or tending gay. I'm very thankful for the support I've found w SSN.

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Rating: 4 stars  

I found the SSN online while I was researching for support of my bad situation in my marriage. I had discovered that after 36yrs of marriage and 3 years prior to marriage my husband is gay! Never had a clue. It's been a devastating blow to my life! Not knowing how to handle the whole situation both emotionally and physically. Through the SSN I have gained, knowledge and support. There are many of this kind of mind blowing marriages out there and if they only knew about SSN, perhaps more could get this support I've received. We are the collateral damage to a growing epidemic in the world. Gay people now have alot of open support and rights, but those of us left behind have none of the same. Just because we are considered "normal". Our lives and marriages have been turned upside down due to those gays who hide behind us, only later to turn on us. SSN needs to get it's message out there for the world to see!!!!

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Rating: 5 stars  

Straight Spouse Network was there for me when I needed it most. After going into a second marriage (stupidly) with a known bisexual, it didn't take long for the wheels to come off in our marriage. I had been "Schooled" to think that being this broken was okay...well, this group of people gave me the confidence to love ME for who I am...I loved the support that I got RIGHT out of the chute, and it keeps getting better for those who need it now. Straight Spouse Network saved my life, literally.

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Rating: 5 stars  

I was heartbroken, stressed, and just lost until I found the straight spouse network. Volunteers frequently check in on me and are always available when I need someone to talk to. I've spent thousands of dollars in copays to mental health professionals and I've made more progress from the free support it's members offer me. Nothing compares to someone who has been down a similar path. It is so easy to feel isolated and hopeless when dealing with such a traumatic upheaval of your life. This group's support is invaluable.

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Rating: 5 stars  

1 person found this review helpful

When my wife 'came out of the closet' and left for another woman, I honestly believed I was alone. I was lost, depressed to the point of suicide. When I found SSN, I found people who understood 'where I was', how I felt. They literally saved my life, and have been beside me thru my entire 'journey'. No other group or organization could have done for me what SSN has.

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